Friday, April 30, 2010

The Beast

This was a very hard day, I had every thought in the book about binging. I fought it hard, because I knew I would have to get on here tonight and write about my day. I didn't want to say that I had given in to the beast. That is what my addiction feels like, A BEAST!!! It consumes my very thought at times. I know that people over eat at times, but the way I overeat isn't normal. When I start to binge it doesn't stop for days or sometimes weeks. I have gained up to 8 pounds in a week before. That is not normal overeatting. It is something that I have to overcome. Food is my drug of choice and when I'm on a binge, getting food feels like a fix. But today, at least, I was able to keep the beast at bay, and I think it had a lot to do with this blog.

I really think blogging is going to help. I'm not saying it is going to be easy, but I am determined to keep myself and this blog honest about what I am eatting and exercising. So, unless I want to get on here and blog that I have overeatten or that I choice not to exercise. I have to get off my butt and do what will make me healthy!

Right now I'm at 26 points for the day, it's not quite bedtime yet, but I am going to stay within my points for the day. I, also, got my walking in. I walked, by myself, for 24 mins this evening. I have to tell you that the walking alone sucks! I hurt all over before it was even half done. The music wasn't enough to distract me from the time and the pain. I do a lot better when I walk with Kevin, the kids, or friends. But I did persevere. I walked on the path in our woods, I won't be able to do that anymore. My shoes were covered in ticks by the time I was done. So, I'm going to have to either walk at the church, Lincoln Boyhood, or Yellig park. lol!

Tomorrow's goals are to stay within my 37 points and walk for 24 min. They are calling for rain here tomorrow, so I'm going to have to walk the treadmill, ugh! Wish me luck! LOL!!!

Hope you have a wonderful day!

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